Yes to God Tuesday... praise God... on Tuesday!

This is part of a book study that we are currently doing on Lelia's blog. We are reading Lisa Whittle's book Behind Those Eyes, What's really going on inside the souls of women. This book is about being real... I mean REAL... no pretending.... no charades, just real, the person that we really are. This is what I want. What is the point of pretending to be someone I am not?? It will exhaust me trying to make sure that no one "finds" me out. Guess how I know?? Because I have played the part before.

This week we are reading Chapter Two

Ms. Perfection

Lisa starts us out with the Sunday morning fake out... you know the one... you have a horrible morning trying to get everyone ready for church, argue all the way to church, and then put on a big smile and a happy voice for everyone. Pretending. Putting on a happy face. Trying to convince everyone that you are the perfect women, the perfect mom, the perfect wife, and the perfect Christian lady. But... on the inside, you know that is far from the truth.

Lisa tells a story about putting together the perfect Easter outfits for her family. Everyone is perfectly dressed. About mid-way through the service she looks down only to find a bright, royal blue ink pen mark across the front of her perfect white linen skirt. She felt as if God has said to her,

"Lisa, you can prepare and plan and anticipate things and seek perfection. But just in case you have forgotten that you are anything but perfect, let this remind you of just that."

Lisa said,

"The pen mark symbolized to me the imperfections in my life, no matter how well thought out and organized I may be.

Boy, can I relate to some imperfections!!

Lisa breaks "Ms Perfection" down for us into three different groups...

The perfect wife syndrome

Lisa said,

"Ms. Perfection really wants to be a good wife. She has all the right tools for it, and she has the willpower and desire to succeed. But in her quest for perfection, she has worked herself into a bad mood even before her husband comes home at the end of the day."

I don't think that I am that person.... but this is what happened today. I may have to rethink this.

This morning, while I wanted to blog jump and spend my day doing things that I wanted and needed to do... my husband had some things that he needed me to do. Like go to the bank, and take the computer to the doctor so that we can print up his customer's bills (something that is VERY important). After his second phone call to see if I was making progress on HIS list of things for me to do... I huffed upstairs to take a shower and get ready. Afterwards, I proceeded to try to get the computer unhooked so that I could lug it to the car. Well... one of the printer cords had made its way under the side of the computer desk... and for the life of me, I could not get it free. I called to see if my husband could hop on over to the house and help me with HIS job for me. Of course not... he was busy! About 15 minutes later and one hernia later... I finally got the cord free and both the computer and the printer to the car. I tried to call him to let him know that I had accomplished my mission. No answer. Within a few minutes he called me back to see what I needed again... I told him about the reason for my call, and he huffed at me...

"You didn't have to call me back, I told you I would call you when I finished this job".

So as I drove out of the neighborhood... I had a conversation with God.... it went like this...

ME: "Did you hear how ungrateful he is??" "I really want to be a good wife, I mean, I really do... but he sure wasn't very kind to me!"

God: "Oh, so you want credit for being a good wife to a good husband??" "Is that it??" "A good wife only if he is the good husband back" "What good is that??"

Me: "Well, no, that isn't what I meant."

God: "Really??, that is what is just sounded like."

I still don't think that I have the perfect wife syndrome... but I have found that it works best when I am real with God. I usually take His rebukes for my poor behavior better than I would if it were my husband. It brings conviction... not anger.

The Perfect Mom Syndrome

Lisa said,

"Sometimes the perfect mom syndrome causes us to fall into the comparison trap with other moms."

"After all, we have been programmed to believe that behind every perfect child is a perfect mom. And we take that role very seriously.

Well... after my past week at the middle school, I guess I have totally blown this charade. No one will buy this one from me anymore... actually I guess it has been quite a long time since I have been able to pull this one off. The thing about the comparrison trap is that we often see what others want us to see... not what is necessarily real. They are just better actors that we might be. Moving right along.....

The Perfect Package

Well... Ha! I wish this were me. Lisa says,

"The perfect package is focused on making her outside look better by any and every means necessary, which may include tweaking, nipping, tucking, pulling, stretching, bleaching, manicuring, lasering, zapping, and comouflaging. While there is nothing necessarily wrong with any of these things, there is a dangerous societal pressure that motivates the perfect package to seek these procedures."

"The perfect package first needs to feel perfect in order for her to sell others on it. And it's become a full-time job."

I wish that I would do something about my lack of the perfect package. But... what can I say,?? I love chocolate. And our finances will keep me from the nipping and tucking until I am too old to care. But I will admit... for the sake of being real... that I am jealous of the ones that do what it takes to be closer to the perfect package. My spirit is weak... and my flesh is even weaker.

The letter that Lisa included at the end of the chapter from her high school friend spoke volumes to me... her friend said that after a lifetime of trying to be perfect she has finally come to a place where she can be herself.... she said,

"Now I strive for obedience- and I bring all my flaws to Him."

God wants my flaws. He wants to use them to show his greatness. I want him to use them for His glory... because honestly... they aren't doing me any good. So... by all means, I will let God use them for someone else's good... HIS.

Want to check out what others thought and learned from this chapter?? Click here.

Also... disclaimer... no time to proofread .... I am at work with no computer at home.