Wednesday, February 4, 2009

A mindful....

***update at bottom***

My mind is so full of stuff. God has been speaking to my heart about some issues lately... and I want no part of what God is showing me may be happening in my heart. Oh! how I want a servant's heart. Then yesterday, my daughter had some issues at school which caused many more things to crowd into my mind. Not to mention that my husband and I don't exactly see eye-to-eye on how to react to this new situation. So after a "not so nice" discussions with my husband.... where I defaulted back to language that I thought had left my vocabulary years ago... I went to bed with tears in my eyes.

This morning I woke up around 4am (because there was a needy little person standing there poking me). Those things started rolling around in my head again. I knew that God was inviting me to come on down to "our spot" a little early so that we could have a little "pow-wow". So I got up and headed downstairs. After pouring my heart out about all the things that were crowding my mind.... asking for His wisdom and guidance... I felt him draw me into His Word.

I just picked up the Bible and opened it... Psalm 51... here are just a few pieces of it....

Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to you great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin. (verses 1-2)

Just what I needed after that sailor talk I had last night. His love is unfailing!! Praise Him.

Surely you desire truth in the inner parts ;
you teach me wisdom in the inmost place. ( verse 6)

Oh yes... I poured out my inner parts to you... and you will be where my wisdom comes from

Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Do not cast me from your presence
or take you Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. (verses 10-12

Oh yes Father... please create a pure heart out of this prideful thing that I have inside me.

You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart,
O' God you will not despise. (verses 16-17)

A broken spirit... a contrite heart is what God desires... is that what I had given Him???

Then I felt led to go ahead and start on my Bible study work... Luke 8:40-56

The story was of Jesus heading to Jairus's house to heal his daughter... and being interrupted by the poor woman that had been bleeding for 12 years. After her touching the hem of His garment and being healed immediately... Jesus continued to Jairus house to find his daughter dead and bunch of doubtful people at the door. Not deterred in any way... He walked in and brought the girl back to life.

Jesus's power is not limited to one miracle work at a time... He has more than enough to go around. He can take on my prideful heart... break it.... purify it... and then move on to all of these other issues that are at hand.

I still don't know what we are going to do about the issues at my daughter's school... we are scheduled to go for a conference on Monday. But, I do know what I am going to do with all the stuff that was rolling around in my head.... I took it to the Father... and I am leaving it there. I will hear His answer when He gives it. Hopefully it will be before Monday... but I trust who God is even when I don't understand the situation. And I know that I am to submit to my husband's authoritiy. He made that clear as well.

Pray for me... and my family. I do not want to do one thing that is outside of my Father's will.
Also... I have a friend having a lumpectomy this morning... say a prayer for her too.
Thanks... Lots of love,

***and if this wasn't enough... as I was trying to proofread my post, my husband called out from the living room that it was time for Beth Moore to be on Life Today. I jumped up and ran in there just in time to hear her teach about TRUST... Her scripture verse was Isaiah 26:3
You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.
She talked about a spewing mind... a mind that is spewing over all kinds of things... and those are the very issues in which I am distrusting God. When I trust God... my mind will be in perfect peace. Thank you Father that you are such a personal intimate God.

post signature


Anonymous said...

It sounds like you and God had a wonderful morning. I hope that you feel re-newed and joyous...that you no longer feel overwhelmed and confused. Enjoy the day. I know how you feel about praying with an humble heart...I know I don't always, but isn't it such a sweet undescribable feeling when you do pray in that manner.

Happy God Wink to you!!!
Thoughts and prayers

jcdisciple said...

Bless you sister! I've been there done that oh so many times...He is so faithful to us!

Runner Mom said...

Oh, girlfriend! This post was awesome. THanks for sharing this! I love how God brings to our herts the Words the He needs us to hear and to chew on for awhile! Some of the seasons of our lives are like that!I will be lifting you up--and your friend as well.

Paula (SweetPea) said...

This is precious, Lynn. I love Psalm 51, particularly verse 10. I feel when I'm tempted or failing in my heart, I cry out to Him with that verse. Praise the Lord He loves us and accepts us even in the midst of our muck and vile that can spew from our minds, hearts, and mouths. Isn't that awesome.

Oh, how He loves a humble heart. He speaks so much about having a humble heart and being aware of a prideful heart.

So glad you had so many moments with Him today. I know as you continue to seek Him, He will show you the way. I also believe even when we seek Him but misread or misunderstand His words, He honors a heart seeking Him and will direct our paths regardless. I say that because I feel I struggle with hearing His answer when I ask Him specifically for them.

Beverly said...

Whew what a day you have had.
God took you where he wanted you when He tapped your shoulder and you obeyed. He will continue to lead you girl.
Keep giving Him your all while He shows you His.

Love ya

Angela said...

I watched Beth the other day also,,and it was so ironic what she was talking about and that very day I wrote two devotionals on my blog,,God truly ministered to my heart through her message.

Laura said...

Oh, Lynn--I could feel the stress ease away as I went through Psalm 51 with you. So comforting.

I will pray for your meeting and this situation. I know how it is to worry about a child.

Praying peace for you,