Welcome to Chapter Two of the Yes to God Tuesdays. If you would like to join in... just pick up a copy of the book and jump in. This book is so easy to read... it wouldn't take you one day to catch up. The book is What Happens When Women Walk In Faith by Lysa Terkeurst
Chapter 2 A Line in the Sand
I loved the story about the rearview mirror. It spoke volumes to me. Lysa made two statements in this section that caused me to do some heavy thinking.
"We can't go ahead with God to new and exciting places if we're spending too much time looking back."
As scary as the future may be... God is already there. He knows what to expect, nothing takes Him by surprise. If my husband and I were on a trip... somewhere I had never been but somewhere that was very familiar to him... I would rest in the fact that He knew where we were going. Do I rest in that fact with God?? I certainly should. Can I just tell you that He is a little more trustworthy than my sweet husband?? God NEVER lets us down. We just can't say the same thing about people. It is not in us to be perfect. But, God and His plan are perfect.
This next statement has sent me reeling, dancing, shouting, and thinking....
"Leaving is usually an act of obedience and not a desire of the heart. It is hard. It causes you to step outside of your comfort zone and enter a life that requires faith."
For those of you that don't know much about me... I have been a homeschooling mom for 6 years. I love having my children home with me. I love the comfort of knowing that I am taking care of them. Last year before Christmas, my 13 year old daughter asked me to think about letting her go to school. I replied very smugly, "I won't think about it... but I will pray about it". I knew that we were doing what God had called us to do... and He would give me MY answer. Well... that didn't happen. God changed the plan on me. Through many months of prayer, crying, and down right wrestling with God... I have surrendered my will to His. My children will be attending public school this fall. I have gone through the motions... testing, choosing classes, touring the schools, etc. This is definitely an act of obedience for me... NOT a desire of my heart. I needed to read this. I needed to see it in print. My heart aches for the time that I will miss with my children. I also work nights three days a week... I will surely miss my days with them. Tears are spilling over the rims of my eyes as I type this. I can give God thousands of reasons that they do not need to go to school. God wants my obedience... not my opinion.
But... I know that God has something new for me to do. I don't know what it is. I don't even know if I want to know what it is right now, I would probably start the wrestling match again. I have made the first step... the leaving. Leaving what I love, leaving what I am comfortable with, leaving my children all day with someone else. Leaving. I am on my way... an act of obedience. Not a desire of my heart. BUT...
Once I took the first step and acknowledged God's choice and my willingness to follow His will, the most amazing thing has happened. God has changed my heart. TONS. I am beginning to find things that will be so good for my children. My little one will love the library, the music class, the computer class, PE, and believe it or not... she is looking forward to the cafeteria. My middle schooler will enjoy learning about computers, technology, careers, and I do believe she will learn a lot about living life. There seems to be a little "all about me attitude" going on... I think that somehow being a little fish in a big sea will work on that.
I could go on and on... The story about the lady that went home to the same circumstances but with a different heart applies to my life as well.
I will sum all this up with Lysa's statement about that lady on the bottom of page 25... but insert my name.
"Lynn will have to depend on God like never before". I am so happy to be coming along on this journey with all of you sweet ladies. I don't have a "dream" yet... but I have at least taken the first step of obedience... leaving.
If you want to hear how this chapter spoke to others go here and see the other participants.
1Peter 3:15
But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared in give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have.
16 comments:
Great post! You are leaving the homeschooling arena, and I am asking God to prepare a way for homeschooling in my life. My daughter is 10 months old. She likes daycare, but I don't like leaving her there. I would much rather be the one teaching her and loving on her during the day. So, we'll see what God has in store!
I found you via Lelia's blog as I'm participating the study as well.
Prayers and Blessings!
Rebecca
Lynn, thanks for sharing about this book. I've been looking for a new book and it sounds like this just might be the one for me.
Lynn-your blog is so beautiful! It all begins with that first step of obedience. That rear view mirrow could get us in trouble if we dont use it right! I am shamed at how much time I have spent looking back...such wasted time.
Walking this journey with you...
In His Graces~Pamela
Lynn,
This is a great post and I enjoyed learning more about you and homeschooling. How totally awesome that once you stepped out in faith, God began to show you all the wonderful things your children will encounter. I love how He changed your heart and your will to conform to HIS.
Oh, I wasn't able to post on my blog but if you would like to read my comments regarding this study, pop over to Lelia's and read my comment there.
Blessings, my friend.
Paula
I too could relate to your homeschool story except on the flip side! I'm preparing to teach my 5 year old after leaving the public school as a teacher. I enjoyed teaching algebra, but the thought of reading is a bit frightening!! God will provide!
Pray God blesses you in the transition that lies ahead, Jill
Lynn, I'm not reading this book, but I definitely relate to your post! I'm also in one of those places where I'm leaving a lot behind... changing places.... forging new paths. I'm scared. I'm excited. I'm mad. I'm disappointed. I'm hopeful. It is such a maddening mixture of everything! Mentally, I think I keep trying to make things go back to the way they used to be.... while God seems to have made it clear that it isn't His plan for me. I need to accept that. Your post helped me to understand that at this point I just have to step forward in an act of obedience and quit waiting for the "desire of the heart" to come.
Lynn, what a great post. I can imagine stepping out on faith and sending your children to school is hard! Obedience to God and faith in Him will see you through. My heart just breaks for your tears! I wish I could just give you a hug and tell you it'll be alright. Your post blessed my heart and I wanted to thank you for sharing it.
"God wants my obedience... not my opinion".
Boy did I need to hear that today!
Thank you~
I'm so glad to be going through this study with such wonderful women. Your post blessed me by witnessing firsthand what it is to take a huge leap of faith and step out of that comfort zone.
Blessings,
Sandra
Lynn,
I'm just responding to your comment about homeschooling - I'd love to hear any advice you might have, especially any lessons experience has taught or what you know now that you wish you knew then! Thanks for the offer to share, Jill
Lynn:
I've wrestled with decisions about what to do with my youngest son this year...even briefly considered homeschooling because of his special needs. But he will return with his sister and older brother this Fall to school. My oldest will be starting his sophomore year in college (talk about letting go...a post to come in the near future).
Change is hard; but I've lived long enought to realize that not only is it inevitable, it can be a very good thing. Yes, God has something for you. Run to it and be amazed. As Beth likes to say...
Follow hard after Jesus and you will run smack-dab into your calling.
I'll be thinking of you. Email anytime you want to talk further.
peace~elaine
Thank you so much for your encouragement on my blog. I'm with you in sometimes wishing he would hurry, yet knowing His timing is perfect.
I loved reading your honesty. It is beautiful how God can change our hearts. Blessings!
Lynn,I can so relate to your post.My daugther will be entering 10th grade at a public scool this year and my heart races with fear for her.
She has been attending,since 3rd grade,at a christian school.I have always felt at peace because God was allowed to walk the halls and sit in the calssrooms with her.
But after reading your post,God reassured me,that he will still be walking the halls and sitting in the classrooms with her. That he is in control.That he will watch over her and wishper in her ear to guide her.It will be her trials and victories that will strengthen her faith.
I too, have to leave it in God's hands. I will be praying for you.
That story about the woman who made a decision to change really moved me too. It is a deliberate thing, isn't it? Sometimes, I find myself on automatic pilot and it doesn't take long to get far off track. That's when I hand God the wheel.
Looking forward to hearing more from you, Lynn!
Lynn,
I loved reading about your heart and the act of obedience to His will for your children's lives this next year.
Lovingly,
Yolanda
Thanks for sharing your leaving story Lynn!! Isn't exciting that God has something else in store. I just wonder if there are kids in the public school who need to see something different walking through the halls. Like Jesus...never know who God will use your kids to touch. How exciting!!
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